Here We Go Again

So I've been meaning to post something in here for ages.  I always start a blog, then get so busy I forget it exists.  There's probably a dozen blogs under my name floating around in cyber space.  My biggest flaw is I change my mind alot, mostly due to surroundings and lack of motivation.  Don't get me wrong, I tend to be super monogamous and a loyal friend, but my desire to stick with projects...well, that could use a little work.

  I have all these brilliant ideas that just never make it to pen and paper (or keyboard and screen).  Especially my dreams, which are always so vivid and epic.  Motivation is common for early 20 somethings to lack.  I should know, I've befriended so many with the same disability as me.  I shouldn't be hesitating when it comes to writing.  Not being in school should give me the drive to stimulate my brain with such an activity.  I find myself just staring at the Zach Galifianakis background of my laptop and thinking, "Why the fuck not?"

  Don't get me wrong, I get absolutely no greater pleasure than writing.  Once I get over the initial hurdle of laziness, I'm golden!  Its like I shut out all surroundings and just go at it...like right now.  It took me almost a month to start a blog.  Seriously, a god damn blog!  A month!  Christ, if only I had the same eagerness to grab a beer after work or waste my paycheck on an entire outfit to pick up a journal!

  I had a day off.  Peeling myself away from the television, turning off my two week long Doctor Who marathon, I began this post.  It also didn't hurt that I had a few friends who were telling me "Dude, start your blog."  I don't blame them.

  They're probably frustrated at what I've become these past couple months.  Watching movie after movie, literally becoming everything I despised: a depressed, slothful young adult with no drive to do anything productive.  I've dumped men for adapting to their parents' basements, too adapted to the point they'll probably be growing roots there at thirty.  I've constructively criticized my peers for becoming one with their couches and listened to them bitch about their melodramatic lives until my brain shut off.  I should really not shut people off when they're talking.  Its just hard when they're talking about absolutely nothing.

  All I've ever wanted was a career doing what I love.  But how can I become an author or a journalist when I couldn't even keep focus on getting my Magazine Journalism degree?  Its exhausting doing absolutely nothing. Mentally, that is.  I'm 22.  I live at home.  I'm lazy.  I must change this.  I must document my life to get the gears going.  Maybe, just maybe, this blog could help me spit on my writers block.  Just kick dirt in the face of my lack of motivation.  At the very least, make me feel like I'm doing something.  Ah, who knows what the future holds, but if I let this blog fall into the Internet abyss like my other blogs, I give anybody reading permission to slap me.